I sit here thinking about the last time I saw your smiling face.
I picture your expression, hear your voice and think back to our conversation.
Tears roll down my face as the images of you flash through my mind.. memories of you overwhelm my emotions in those moments.
I’m caught in that place between disbelief and sadness and my heart hurts in a way that I don’t know that I’ve ever felt.
I look at my phone and read your last words to me and I wipe away the tears.
I wish I tried to see you more, call you more, tell you that I loved you more.
I fight back the feelings as I think about the past..and you.
I can’t believe that I can’t call you and hear your voice.
I can’t believe see your smiling face .. the face which use to greet me whenever I call or I come to visit.
Part of me won’t believe that you are going away from me…I want hug you again, hear you laugh or spend time with you again.
It’s a hard thing when how can someone going away….when they love each other so deeply at the age when they really understand meaning of love…is it okay..? I dont know
I don’t know that I’ll be able to make peace with it for a while, but that’s part of the process, I guess…but im not ready to accept it …NOOOO
Still, want to hug you, hold your hand or see your smile again…each and every day …every single min. I’m never letting you go…anywhere yessss anywhere…
